The Family that Plays Together, Stays Together
Family vacation – It almost sounds like the name of a movie! If your family vacations are anything like ours, they can be nearly as comical as the National Lampoon’s Vacation movies.
We gather once a year to vacation together. The great-grandparents. The grandparents. The parents. The grandchildren.
Some of our vacation memories include hauling overtired grandkids off the beach kicking and screaming; toddlers stealthily escaping Pack ‘N Plays; fishhooks stuck in fingers; potty accidents galore; screeching infants up at the crack of dawn; angry babies crammed in lifejackets; and bickering cousins.
All true. But also, heartfelt vacation memories include cuddling with kiddos under a beach umbrella; playing games around the kitchen table; seeing our children lovingly interact with their own families; carrying on family traditions; reading stories before bed; and endless recounting of “remember when….”
That’s the good, the bad and the ugly. And I wouldn’t trade it for the world. Sure, sometimes it’s exhausting, but time with all my grandkids at the same place is a gift. It’s all an Impactful Grandparent could dream of.
I love watching everyone play together. It’s like Cousin Camp every day. But I also like to intentionally single out each grandchild for special one-on-one time.
Littles love to play
It’s easy with the little ones – they soak up whatever you’re willing to do. Play in the water, build a sandcastle, go on a nature walk, paint rocks, etc.
Kids love to be silly. Once, I took my grands swimming in the pouring rain. They loved it! A little rain can’t dampen your fun. Another time, my husband made rain ponchos out of garbage bags and we went fishing.
Tired moms and dads are grateful, too. They get a little break and appreciate your help filling their kiddo’s love bucket.
Just a thought – but if your grandchild needs a nap, you could offer to keep an eye on the monitor to give their parents a little together time. Yes, it’s important to invest in our grandkids. But it’s also valuable to invest in our children’s marriages. They need playtime, too.
Yup. Right.
It’s a lot of fun to hang out with older grandkids. Go on a hike. Shoot baskets. Take them to a movie. Have a fishing competition. Go snaking (I mean, that’s clearly one for Papa. Not my jam.) Walk to the ice cream shop. You can never go wrong when ice cream is involved.
Just don’t expect them to sit there and converse like adults. It’s not fun to fire off 200 questions only to receive 200 monosyllabic replies. Yup. Right. Cool. Sure.
Do you best not to be a cheugy grandparent. (Cheugy is current slang for being out of date or a person who is trying too hard.) Just be yourself and you’ll slay it (do great). You get points for showing you love them and want to spend time together. Whatever you do, don’t try to use their slang words. That’s cringy.
Reconnect
For grandkids you don’t get to see often, family vacation provides the perfect opportunity to reconnect. Go golfing, miniature or regular. Make jewelry. Visit something touristy. Ride a horse or a bike Play tennis or pickleball. Go out to a restaurant.
Seeing my out-of-state grandkids for an extended period helps maintain our relationship. It doesn’t take long, and we are back in sync.
The fun factor
There’s no need to micromanage the fun, but sometimes there’s a lull in the action. Maybe the cousins want to reconnect and aren’t sure how. Or, frankly, sometimes the kids are just bonkers and need some direction. Download an Impactful Grandparent Action Plan and put it to work. Run a mini–Cousin Camp and see cousins loosen up as they act silly and play together.
You could take one Action Plan and break it into several sessions. No need to organize a full day. The kids don’t want a full day of programming and – you’re on vacation, too! Just implement bits and pieces of the plan when it’s helpful. Hint: You can never go wrong with Water Fun.
Grandma loves Grandpa
Yes, yes, yes. All that family time is great. But take a little time with your spouse, too. It’s important for little eyes (and their parents, too) to see how Grandma and Grandpa still love each other – even if they are old! Listen to the cousins giggle when you give each other a kiss. Ew! We are still role modeling, even in our golden years. So, show them what a healthy marriage looks like and enjoy a little couple time, too. It can be as simple as some early morning fishing – just the two of you at the end of the dock.
Don’t run the show
Should I say that twice? Maybe I’ll hear it myself if I repeat it often enough.
This year, I’m vowing not to over-do it. That means: I don’t have to plan every meal. Or step in when kids are squabbling. Or constantly pick up items strewn about. Or take everything everyone says personally. Or stress out when words get terse.
Striving for perfection and worrying about everyone else spoils my fun. I’m letting go. Lightening up. Leaving unrealistic expectations behind. This will be a vacation where I simply focus on quality time with the people I love so much. (I promise an update later on my success.)
